


You Reap What You Sow

by FunnyWings



Category: Supernatural
Genre: 13.19 coda, 13x19 Coda, Episode: s13e19 Funeralia, F/M, Past Jessica Moore/Sam Winchester, Post-Episode: s13e19 Funeralia, Rowena's POV, pre-Rowena/Sam
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-21
Updated: 2018-04-21
Packaged: 2019-04-25 17:37:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,725
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14383656
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FunnyWings/pseuds/FunnyWings
Summary: Rowena agreed to stay the night in the bunker until she could find something more to her tastes.Excerpt:“Sam’s changed,” Jessica said, after a moment. “He’s changed a lot. He used to have a better sense of humor. Then again, I suppose I should try going to hell for a few thousand years and see if I ever feel like smiling again.”“It’s worse than you can imagine. It wasn’t just hell, it was- It was worse, what Samuel went through. Worse than you think,” Rowena said. She looked away from Jessica. “I won’t tell him about you. It’d only hurt his feelings. And he’s such a delicate lad.”“He tried to kill in you in cold blood today,” Jessica pointed out helpfully.“Bring up the past, why don’t you?” Rowena said, burying the thread of hurt that tugged from her.





	You Reap What You Sow

Rowena agreed to stay the night in the bunker until she could find something more to her tastes. She said as much to Sam and Dean when they gave her a cursory tour and showed her which room she would be allowed to use.

“C’mon lads, don’t you ever miss the sunlight? No wonder you’re such a brooding gloomy lot,” Rowena had replied scathingly when the Winchesters had had the audacity to look offended at her refusal to stay long term. “I’ll be around, and preferably where the food hasn’t started to develop a consciousness of its own.”

This at least struck something of a nerve.

“I mean she’s not wrong. You could clean out the fridge. And your room. How do you keep a cheeseburger for three days anyway? Why?” Sam had muttered to Dean, who made a very rude gesture in response.

“First of all, fuck you. And second of all, if it’s such a big deal why don’t you clean fridge out?” Dean asked. “Why’s that my job? Hell why doesn’t Cas clean the fucking fridge out?”

“Cas doesn't even eat.”

“Yeah, well whose fault is that?” Dean asked. “I don’t know, is it too much to ask that he sticks around and helps out around the place sometimes? Or just sticks around?”

“What are you even talking about?” Sam asked. Dean muttered something about beer and walked off without another word. Sam looked for a moment like he might press the issue, but decided to let it go and sat at one of the library chairs instead. Rowena sat across from him.

“Well, I suppose it’s just you and me now, Samuel,” Rowena said. “When you kill me, you’ll make it quick won’t you, dearie?”

“I’m not-“ Sam started. He shook his head and stood up, walking off to presumably be by himself. For the legendary team they were supposed to be, the two Winchester boys seemed to have developed rather solitary habits. Rowena supposed if you spent too long with any person you would grow tired of them. She’d certainly begun to grow tired of herself.

“Well, I suppose it’s just me then,” she said, resting her chin on her hands. Dear God, she had not wanted to be alone with her thoughts.

“I’m here, too,” harped a cheery voice. If Rowena were not too dignified for such things (and bone tired), she might have jumped. As it was, she just side eyed the cheery reaper across from her.

“Aren’t you a pretty thing,” she said, only vaguely interested. “You’re young for a reaper. The flesh has hardly started to melt from your bones.”

“I don’t know,” Jessica said, flashing the horribly burned and spectral visage of her true face. It was only a second before she carefully had her mask back in place. “Most people like this better. Less scary.”

“Who’d find you scary, love?” Rowena asked. “It’s your boss they’re afraid of. You’re just the messenger. Reapers are a useless lot, anyway.”

“Aw, that’s mean,” said Jessica. “I do lots of useful things.”

“And what would those be?” Rowena asked, beginning to get bored.

“Keeping you company, for one. Keeping my eyes on Winchesters,” said Jessica. “It’s not the worst thing I’ve had to do on the job. Explaining to starving children that they’re dead, that’s hard. Despite the circumstances, this is a lot more fun.”

“And do they know about you?” Rowena asked her, raising an eyebrow. Jessica shook her head.

“And they won’t,” Jessica said. “It’s not even me anymore. Not really. I’m assuming you’ve read the Winchester gospels, if you recognize me. I’ve always hated those things. I barely got a page, you know that? Mary Magdalene got more than a page.”

“I’ve done my research. Knowing the right thing at the right time is a good way to keep yourself alive,” Rowena confirmed. “You’ve still got a wee touch of blonde hair clinging to the back of your head. And you kept your name. It wasn’t a hard guess.”

Jessica seemed untouched by the information.

“I thought they would figure it out,” said Jessica. “But they didn’t. He didn’t. I think it’s better that way, though.”

“Easier for you,” Rowena corrected.

“Sam’s changed,” Jessica said, after a moment. “He’s changed a lot. He used to have a better sense of humor. Then again, I suppose I should try going to hell for a few thousand years and see if I ever feel like smiling again.”

“It’s worse than you can imagine. It wasn’t just hell, it was- It was worse, what Samuel went through. Worse than you think,” Rowena said. She looked away from Jessica. “I won’t tell him about you. It’d only hurt his feelings. And he’s such a delicate lad.”

“He tried to kill in you in cold blood today,” Jessica pointed out helpfully.

“Bring up the past, why don’t you?” Rowena said, burying the thread of hurt that tugged from her. “As if he wouldn’t do the same to you if he thought he’d get away with it.”

“Oh, I don’t think so,” said Jessica. “I’m a line through to Death. Like it or not, they’ll want to keep on her good side. Trust me, everyone wants to keep on her good side. We’re all lucky she’s trying to keep things mostly balanced instead of wiping the slate clean. The old Death didn’t exactly make it easy for her.”

“So end times really are coming once again,” Rowena said. “You’d think the world would find a better hobby.”

“You’d think,” Jessica agreed. “And yet here we are.”

“Busy time for reapers, the end of days,” said Rowena. “It must be a hard job.”

“It’s better than the alternative,” said Jessica. “The lights are this close to going out in heaven. It almost makes me glad I couldn’t get in. The demon possessing good old Brady, bless his black heart, made sure of that. Not everyone gets a choice about where they go when they die. Going to hell sounded worse than being a reaper, and look at me, I was right.”

“You sound awfully cheerful about all of this,” Rowena muttered. Jessica shrugged.

“It’s part of the programming. It helps calm people down when their reaper is friendly,” she said. “Besides, why not take advantage of a little emotional numbing? I’m not human anymore, why should I have to feel like one?”

“I suppose I can understand that,” said Rowena. “Most of us don’t have the option to turn everything off. We have to live with the pain.”

“If it’s any consolation, you’re not doing a horrible job of it. I’ve seen worse,” said Jessica. She reached forward and patted one of Rowena’s hands. “I should probably get back to the ether soon, it’s way better for spying. One last thing?”

“I’m listening.”

“Watch out for Sam for me,” Jessica said. Her voice was a little more subdued, if only for a second. “Make sure he’s alright? I’m stuck with the hands off approach, but you…”

“You want me to coddle the man who’s going to kill me,” said Rowena. “I think you’re asking for a tad too much, dear.”

“Sam kills everyone he loves eventually,” said Jessica. “Doesn’t mean it’s not worth it.”

“That hardly seems a fair way to put it. And who said anything about love?” demanded Rowena. “He’s a handsome lad, but that hardly means a thing to me.”

“You're the witch and I'm the one who burned to death at twenty two years old,” said Jess. “I think I’ve earned the right to be unfair. And as unfair as it may be, I am asking you. Make sure he’s okay. I’m not sure there’s anyone else who can anymore.”

Before Rowena could reply, Jessica disappeared from view. What a gift that must be, to be able to have the last word so definitively. Rowena huffed and sat back in her chair, unsettled by the conversation.

“Were you talking to someone?”

Rowena looked up to see that Sam had returned to the library. He was holding in his hand the book of spells he’d torn a page from, the page that had restored Rowena to full power. She did her best not to stare at the book longingly.

“Just a stray reaper. No one of consequence,” Rowena said. Sam shrugged and sat down letting the book land heavily on the table. “Am I to assume I’m not allowed to have that?”

Sam looked down at the book.

“Not unsupervised,” he said, carefully. “But I was thinking… we need all the help we can get. And if there’s something in here that can help us…”

Rowena stood up and walked around the table. She opened the grimoire and started looking through pages. She supposed if there was a spell that would work against an archangel, it would be in here.

“Where should we start?” Rowena asked. “Michael? Lucifer? Tracking down the troublesome Gabriel?”

“There’s a spell for that?”

“There could be,” said Rowena, thoughtfully. She turned a page. “Magic. My saving grace.”

The words tasted bitter in her mouth. How long had she been alive without understanding that that desperate feeling of wanting to be enough was never going to go away? All of that ambition, all of that hard work, what had it been for? To fall to her knees before Death herself and cry because it wasn’t fair. None of it had been fair.

“It could be,” said Sam, gently. Perhaps the reaper had put ideas in her head, or perhaps Rowena was feeling more sorry for herself than she thought, but for a moment it seemed as though Sam understood what she wasn’t saying. “I’m not going to kill you, you know that right?”

Rowena just smiled.

“Oh, don’t make promises you can’t keep,” she said. “As I said, where should we start?”

Sam barely hesitated.

“Lucifer.”

“A man after my own heart,” Rowena said. A spell to kill an archangel, even a weakened archangel, would be complicated, if not impossible. Then again, Rowena knew success was guaranteed. Her executioner was sitting next to her and that gave her the confidence to know no one else could touch her. Lucifer was going to burn, and if that was the only justice Rowena could claim, she was damn well going to claim it. “Then let’s begin.”


End file.
